


Whispers Of You

by MyJediLife



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Ben Solo Needs A Hug, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Heavy Angst, Loving Marriage, Mutual Pining, Redeemed Ben Solo, Sex, Slow Burn, SwoloFic, Temporary Amnesia
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-09
Updated: 2019-09-18
Packaged: 2019-10-24 19:00:35
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 8,760
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17709773
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MyJediLife/pseuds/MyJediLife
Summary: Fic for the "Prompt a Swolo" for February 2019.A little "50 First Dates" with some "The Notebook" vibes thrown in for good measure.Ben looked up from his datapad a standard hour later, his brow furrowing as he felt something ripple through the Force, his bond with his wife going numb. Standing up, the datapad forgotten as it crashed to the floor, Ben clutched at his heart, his eyes wide with panic as he searched through the Force for the tendril, the thread, he associated with his wife.A sigh of relief escaped his lips as he found it, following it to Rey’s presence within the Force, stopping as it just… faded? What was going on? Mentally beating on it proved futile, and Ben’s heart started pounding in his chest, his breath coming in gasps. Rey was there, she was alive… but she was gone.





	1. Day One

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Azuwrite](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Azuwrite/gifts).



[](https://imgur.com/p5qgOsv)

_DAY ONE_

The war had raged on for far too long, until finally, the Resistance crumbled, leaving the First Order in charge of the Galaxy. Those still with the Resistance had split up, going into hiding wherever they feel safest. For Ben and Rey Solo, it had been Chandrila. Finn and Rose had also gone to Chandrila, refusing to leave their best friends sides after they had all been through so much together.

Ben and Rey had been married for five years now, and three years ago they had been blessed with triplets – two sons with dark hair and hazel eyes, and a precocious daughter who had her Daddy wrapped around her tiny fingers. They had a good life – a small home on the beach, with a yard the kids could run and play on, and they tried to ignore the fact that their world was controlled by a vicious military junta that could come for them at any moment.

It had worked for them – until today.

“Ben? Could you stay with the kids while I go to the market?” Rey appeared in the doorway, her eyes lighting up at the sight of her husband, a datapad in hand as he sat on their back porch, reading a holonovel.

“Of course, be careful?” Ben looked up at his wife, love shining in his dark eyes for the mother of his children.

“You know I always am,” Rey said, stepping onto the porch and leaning down, her lips meeting his in a loving kiss. “I love you,” she said softly.

Ben reached up with one hand, his thumb skimming over her lips softly. “And I love you, my light. Come back to us soon.”

Ben looked up from his datapad a standard hour later, his brow furrowing as he felt _something_ ripple through the Force, his bond with his wife going numb. Standing up, the datapad forgotten as it crashed to the floor, Ben clutched at his heart, his eyes wide with panic as he searched through the Force for the tendril, the thread, he associated with his wife.

A sigh of relief escaped his lips as he found it, following it to Rey’s presence within the Force, stopping as it just… faded? What was going on? Mentally beating on it proved futile, and Ben’s heart started pounding in his chest, his breath coming in gasps. Rey was there, she was alive… but she was _gone_.

Ben hit the button on his comlink that would contact Finn, trying to stay calm and just stay balanced, even though the Force was thrumming with his anger inside him.

_There is no emotion, there is only peace. There is no emotion, there is only peace._

His friend’s voice crackled through the com finally, making Ben jump slightly. “Ben? Whatcha need?”

“Finn,” Ben said, his voice tight and full of stress as he answered. “I… I need you to come watch the kids for me. Something… something happened to Rey. I need to go to her. Now.”

Finn’s voice was tense as he responded, “Already on my way. Keep calm, Ben.”

“Easier said than done, Finn. But I am trying.”

As their kids came running up to him, talking about a bug they had found in the yard, Ben tried his best to hold it together for them. He wouldn’t worry the children. Squatting down so he was the same height, Ben acted like he was hearing the most exciting story in the Galaxy, the smile on his lips purely there for his triplets’ sake.

Because inside, he was anything but calm. He felt the same terror he had felt the first time Rey had been injured with the Resistance after he had left the First Order. Was any of the turmoil worth it if all it brought them was pain and suffering?

Finn burst through the door without knocking, the triplets immediately going to their Uncle Finn. Ben didn’t wait another moment longer before rushing out of the house, his long strides making short work of the walk to the market just down the street from their home. He sent out the Force ahead of him, sensing for both danger and Rey.

His heart sang as he caught sight of his wife – still as beautiful as the day he had first seen her on Takodana. She was sitting on a bench outside the market, staring out at the ocean beyond the marketplace with an almost serene expression on her face.

“Rey? Sweetheart, you had me so worried!”

Ben sat down on the bench next to his wife, his large hand reaching out to take hers as he searched her face for a moment. Rey looked at him, her eyes lacking the normal light they had when she looked at him. What was going on?

Ben’s heart started racing, a cold fear starting to creep through his veins as the Force almost rang out with discord. Something was terribly, terribly wrong with their Bond, and it took his beath away momentarily.

“It’s a beautiful day, isn’t it?” Rey said, her eyes looking back at the ocean.

“It is, yes. Rey… what… what’s going on?”

Her hazel eyes met his, and she pulled her hand away from his, confusion causing her brows to knit together.

“I’m sorry… do I know you? You obviously know me from somewhere. I admit, I am terrible with names.” Rey laughed, a sound that normally brought great joy to Ben. This laugh, however, was wrong somehow, and his heart clenched painfully in his chest, his breath coming in gulps.

_What is wrong with my wife? Why doesn’t she recognize me? Oh Maker – the kids! How will I explain this to the kids?_

The life that they had started together five years ago was slipping away by the second, and Ben didn’t know how he could fix it. He felt the panic start to take him over, his heart beating so fast he was certain it would just clench up and stop, his breath coming in pants as he tried to gain control.

He had to, for Rey. _His Rey. His Light. His **Everything**._

“My name is Ben. Ben Solo.” Ben’s eyes never left Rey, surely she had to remember something of all their years together? It couldn’t just be… _gone._ Like their life together never even happened – could it? Surely she’d remember their children… Ryden Luke, Braxis Han and Leia Rose had to be etched onto her heart like they were on his, right?

Ben wanted to cry, the tears pooling at the sides of his eyes as he bit his bottom lip and swallowed hard around the lump in his throat. He had to stay strong. He had to figure this out.

“Rey, what’s the last thing you remember?” Ben asked her softly, watching for the familiar light in her eyes that she always got when they were together. As she looked at him, her brows furrowing as she thought, Ben didn’t see that light, his heart still pounding away painfully as he fought off the panic.

“Um, sitting on this bench. Looking at the ocean. It’s familiar. Comforting. And then you showed up, Ben, is it? You have kind eyes, has anyone ever told you that?”

“Yes. My… someone close to me tells me that a lot.” Ben said softly, somehow knowing that telling Rey she was his wife would do nothing but frighten her, and if she ran off in terror, her memories gone, he would be in even more danger than they were in every day from the First Order.

“Rey, I know this seems, well, perhaps a bit sudden, but… would you like to have dinner with me?” Ben looked into Rey’s eyes, hoping that if he got her alone, in some romantic little restaurant… maybe her memories would return and they could just go home and play with their children like they did every other night.

“I am a bit hungry, why not?” Rey said after a moment’s thought. “I’d like to get to know you, Ben Solo. Your eyes are kind, but sad.”

_If only you knew why, my light. If only you knew why._


	2. As Time Passes

[](https://imgur.com/3ED5VNB)

**Day 17**

_I know someday you’ll have your memories back, my light, and then I will let you read this holodiary. Every day is a struggle for me, you know how I get when you’re injured, or sick… or even when you are just exhausted from a long day, worried about the kids, about the First Order somehow finding us. I worry. It’s my job, as your husband. As your **soulmate**. _

_This is tearing me to pieces, Rey, because you’re **here** , in our home. You’re sleeping in our bed – but you’re not here. Oh, you look like my wife. You smell like her, your mannerisms are exactly the same – but you don’t remember me. You don’t remember all the moments we have shared together, moments which are etched onto my heart, onto my soul… I miss you, Rey. I miss you so damn much, and I am barely holding on._

_It’s not a memory wipe. I would be able to reverse that. That was the first thing I thought of. It’s like nothing I have ever seen before. I swear to you, my light… **I will figure this out. You will come back to me – to us. You have to, because I will never make it without you.**_

“Um, hello?”

Ben looked up to see Rey standing hesitantly in the doorway, like she had every morning for the last sixteen days. It was always the same routine – he thought they had made headway during the day, she would kiss his cheek softly and thank him for their day together before going to sleep in their bed – leaving him to sleep in their guest bedroom – and then the routine would start all over again the next day.

“Good morning, Rey,” Ben said, trying to keep his voice light as he looked at her. She looked beautiful, of course. It always amazed him, how his Galaxy seemed to revolve around her. Her hair was mussed from sleep, and her eyes were still half lidded as she looked at him.

“Did you sleep well?” Ben asked her softly, wanting to pull her into his arms and claim her lips in a kiss, just like he had every day for the past five years. Instead, he stayed seated at his small desk, his eyes simply watching her from across the room.

“Yes, thank you. I’m sorry, I feel like I should remember your name, but I don’t…” Rey’s brows knitted together in confusion, the same way they always did.

“My name is Ben,” his voice was soft and oh so sad as he answered her, his eyes moving to his datapad on the desk once more as he tried to keep the sadness from his face.

“Right. Ben. Am I… your servant? I am having trouble remembering, I’m sorry. Everything is so foggy outside of me waking up this morning.” Rey moved across the room, coming to stand in front of the transparisteel window that overlooked their back yard. Rose and Finn were watching over the children, the five of them laughing and singing as they played some imaginary game with the kids.

“No. You’re…”

_Everything, Rey. You’re everything. My light. My love. Come back to me!_

Nodding, Ben sighed and said softly, “Yes. You were hired yesterday to care for my children and my home.”

“Alright. Would you like me to make you breakfast, sir?” Rey was still looking at the window, a small smile coming to her lips as she watched the children playing. It sparked a glimmer of hope in Ben’s heart – would she finally remember their children? Was she remembering him?

Rey looked up at him, her hazel eyes sparkling in the sunlight coming in through the window. “Those are the children, then?”

Ben found the all too familiar lump forming in his throat at her words. Not trusting his voice, Ben nodded, swallowing hard and willing the tears to stay at bay before finally speaking. “Yes. They are triplets. Braxis, Ryden and Leia.”

“They are beautiful children, sir – Ben.”

_Of course they are,_ Ben thought to himself, _Because their mother is the most exquisite, beautiful being ever created._

“Thank you, Rey. How about I make breakfast for everyone while you get settled in and acclimated?” After a moment’s hesitation, Rey nodded.

“That would be nice, Ben. Thank you.”

…

**Day 32**

_I am still no further along in figuring out what took your memories from you than I was on the first day it happened. I am sorry, my light, I am failing you, and so much time is being wasted._

_I long to hold you while we fall asleep, like I did every night for the five years before this happened.  I wait until you fall asleep every night, and I just stand in the doorway of our room and watch you sleep. I don’t know what else to do, nothing is working, and I feel you slipping away every single day. It’s excruciating. Please, come back, Rey. We need you. **I need you.**_

Ben was in his usual place at his desk, the morning light flooding the room. A small movement in the doorway caught his attention, and he turned in his seat to see his daughter standing there, her eyes sleepy still as she clutched a doll in one hand, the other hand rubbing at her eyes. His eyes lit up as he watched her, the perfect blend of Rey and him in one being.

“Good morning, Princess,” Ben said softly, opening his arms for Leia. She scooted across the room and climbed into his lap, nuzzling against his chest and smiling up at him.

“Morning, Daddy,” Leia said in her tiny voice. “Daddy, when is our real Mommy coming back?”

Ben felt the tears pricking at his eyes, and he had to bite them back before speaking, his voice wavering as he said, “I don’t know, Princess. I don’t know.”

…

The kids were in bed, and Ben found himself sitting across the dining room table from Rey, a smile on her face as she laughed at something Ben had said. He could almost imagine that this was _his_ Rey, and that he would wake up in the morning from some horrible dream. Ben knew he wasn’t any closer to figuring out the mystery of his wife’s missing memories, though, so he would have to be satisfied with the tiny glimpses he sometimes got of her.

He _missed_ her, though. It was absolute agony to have Rey so close – yet so far away.

Looking up from his musings to find Rey staring back at him, her hazel eyes full of a longing he hadn’t seen in over a month now, Ben reached out with a shaking hand, his fingers pushing a stray shock of hair behind her ear, his thumb stroking her cheek softly before he pulled it away, a blush coloring his face.

_She still feels the same as my Rey. I don’t want to scare her away forever._

“Sorry,” Ben said softly.

Rey just smiled at him before standing and coming around the table, her eyes still full of longing as she leaned in and kissed his cheek softly. “Don’t be. I liked that. Goodnight, Ben, I’ll see you in the morning.” Turning, Rey headed into their bedroom, leaving Ben feeling the all too familiar sadness at her departure.

“Goodnight, Rey,” he said sadly, his eyes gazing at the now closed bedroom door sadly.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben and Rey share a tender moment together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As this is a gift fic for my Beta - any and all errors are solely mine.

**Day 75**

_Uncle Luke came to visit last night. Apparently, your affliction is the biggest topic amongst dead Jedi’s. I miss you, Rey. Leia keeps asking me when her real Mommy is coming back, and I have no idea what to tell her. I did send off a message to Maz. If there is anyone who can figure this out, it might be her._

_You let me hold you for a while last night. I took you out to dinner at our favorite little café, the one on the waterfront? We walked along the beach afterwards, and things were just.. nice. I could almost imagine that it was really you with me, instead of someone that looks exactly like you, but has no memory of us._

_I miss you. Please, come home from wherever you are._

The door creaked open, and Ben didn’t even have to turn to know who it was that stood just inside the room. “Good morning, Rey. Did you sleep well?” Ben half turned, knowing that she would be standing there, her hair mussed from sleep and confusion in her eyes. It had been the same routine for two and a half months now.

“Yes, thank you. I’m sorry, I know I should…” Rey started, saying the same words she had said for the last six weeks.

“Ben. My name is Ben Solo,” he sighed and swiped a hand through his hair in annoyance. “And your name is Rey. Rey Solo. You’re my wife. Mother to my children. Kriff, do we have to go through this every morning? Why can’t you remember?” Ben was yelling now, his words bouncing off the durasteel walls of their home.

Rey shrank back against the half-opened door, eyes wide and scared as she watched the man – Ben, he had said his name was. “I-I’m so-rry…” with a loud squeak, Rey turned and raced from the room as a large vase zoomed across the room on its own, crashing into the wall and shattering into tiny shards, littering the Coruscanti tile floor.

Ben huffed as she left the room, one large hand brushing through his hair in annoyance. This whole situation was keeping him off balance, and the temper that he had learned how to keep under tight control after leaving the First Order and shredding the mantle of Kylo Ren was surfacing – and he had no one to help him, to soothe all the sharp, jagged edges that he had somehow managed to cover after meeting Rey.

Because it was usually her helping him. Rey. His light.

She had always had a way of calming him, of soothing all those sharp edges. But this version of Rey – the one that had been robbed of her memories – she had no clue how to soothe him. She didn’t even know him – not the way _his_ Rey did.

Rey could sense his moods even before they hit him. She knew him, intimately, wholeheartedly – and better than he knew himself. He needed her back, he was drowning on his own, being pulled under the crashing waves over and over again. Someday he wasn’t going to resurface.

“Rey?” Ben called out after he had calmed himself down. He hadn’t meant to react the way he had, hadn’t meant to scare her.

“Y-yes, Ben?” Rey appeared in the doorway, her small frame shaking in fear and her eyes wide as she looked at him. He wanted to take her into his arms to soothe her, but instead Ben bit his bottom lip hard, both to keep the tears at bay and to give him anything else to think about but doing just that.

“I’m sorry,” Ben said softly, looking up at Rey. The anguish in his eyes was something he was certain the whole Galaxy could see if they looked at him. He was a man broken, a man who had once had the Galaxy, but had lost it in one fell swoop. “I… I know you have no reason to trust me, but… you are my wife. We’ve been married for five years now, and we have three amazing, beautiful children. They have your eyes and personality – I honestly don’t think they get much from me.” Ben barked out a sad laugh before continuing.

Rey had crept softly further into the room as Ben spoke, her hazel eyes just watching the obviously broken man as he spoke. She didn’t remember him – she was certain of that – how would she ever forget being married to someone as handsome as him? She was positive she had seen agony at some point in her life, though, because she recognized it in Ben. He was in agony – as much as a person could be in.

Rey shuffled closer as Ben continued his story.

“I… I don’t even know why I am telling you all this. Something happened to you, Rey, two and a half months ago. You kissed me goodbye and went to the market, and… something happened. I _felt_ it happen. When I found you – well, you didn’t remember me, or our children. It was as if the last five years of our lives were erased from your head somehow. I am trying to figure it all out… but I’m losing hope.” Ben looked up at her, a tear trailing down his face.

Rey stepped closer now, moved by his anguish. Reaching out with one hand, Rey touched Ben’s arm gently, licking her lips as she tried to find the right words to help him somehow. Finally, a flash of something came to her mind, and she said softly, “Hope is like the sun. If you only believe in it when you can see it, you'll never make it through the night.”

His mother’s words hit Ben like a ton of bricks, making him blink feverishly to try and keep the tears at bay. “W-where did you… did you remember something, Rey?” Her touch felt so good, and Ben just wanted to take her into his arms. He craved her touch, like a man dying of thirst craved water.

Rey shook her head, sad that she didn’t remember anything of their lives together – only words that appeared in her head for some reason.

“No… I just… _saw_ the words, I guess. I don’t even know where they came from,” Rey admitted softly. “I just wanted to try and comfort you. You look like… well, you look like the saddest man I have ever seen. I’m sorry, Ben, I wish I could remember you. I wish I could remember our life, because you seem so kind. But I don’t… I don’t remember _anything._ ”

Ben swiped a hand over his face, trying to wipe the tears and heartache away somehow. The act was fruitful, he knew – he could never wipe the heartache away – not until he had Rey back. He was nothing without her, just an empty shell of a man, going through the motions for his children.

Rey watched Ben, squeezing his arm softly as she watched the war going on within him. For some reason, she could _feel_ his anguish as if it was her own, swirling around and through him in waves. “Ben,” Rey said softly, licking her lips again, “Would… would it help if I let you hold me? Would that ease your anguish?” Looking at him, Rey didn’t think she would mind his strong arms around her. It seemed like he needed that from her, and while she may be the cause of his pain, maybe this would help ease it – at least for a short time.

Swallowing hard past the lump in his throat that seemed to be ever present, Ben just looked at Rey for a moment, her words rolling around in his head for only a split second before he reached out, pulling her slender frame against his. He let the tears fall as he buried his face in her hair, his arms tight around her as he wept.

Rey let her arms loop around Ben’s neck, knowing that he needed this from her. She might not know him, might not remember their lives together – but she knew a few things just from looking at Ben Solo. He was in pain, and he loved her deeply. She would do this for him, because he needed her – even if she didn’t remember.


	4. That Which You Seek...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben finds answers in Hapes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to my Beta and moodboard artist: [Azuwite](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Azuwrite)... I couldn't do it without you! :)

[](https://imgur.com/9UCUe6u)

**DAY 215**

 

_ I’m so worried you are never coming back to us. The triplets birthday was last week. Physically, you were there, but I wish you had  _ really _ been there. I’ve been trying to help you remember, taking you to our favorite places, fixing you your favorite foods, even watching your favorite holoshows – the ones that normally make me roll my eyes because they are  _ so  _ ridiculous. _

_ Someday soon, I hope – because, I am Leia Organa-Solo’s son, after all – you’ll be reading this after getting your memories back, and you’ll laugh and tell me how silly I was for ever doubting.  _

 

_ Until then, my light, I miss you. So much. _

 

Ben was so engrossed in writing his journal entry, that he didn’t notice the red light on his holowatch blinking to indicate a message coming in. When he did notice, he pressed the button to activate the device, the image of Maz Kanata coming into focus – her eyes through her thick lenses peering at him.

 

“Ben Solo! Dear child, I am sorry to have kept you waiting for so long! I had a little trade dispute to settle, which led into a larger labor dispute. You know how these things go. Have you found the answer you were seeking yet, dear boy? Is your precious wife back to herself?”

 

Ben had to swallow hard to keep tears at bay – it was common for him now, after six months of Rey losing her memories. His family and friends knew that more than often, any mention of Rey would invoke tears from him. They tried to reassure Ben they would figure out what happened – but each day that passed made him doubt it more and more.

 

Maybe this was his new normal – his wife being there physically – but without any memory of their life together. Waking up each morning, knowing that he would have to explain their lives to Rey over again. It was exhausting.

 

Ben focused his wavering attention back on his holowatch, shaking his head sadly. “No change, Maz. Have you found anything?”

 

Maz peered at him once more through the hologram, leaning in closer as she said softly, “The answers you seek, Ben Solo, lie within your own family. The answers you seek lie with a sister of Dathomir. Your answers lie in the Hapes Cluster.”

 

“Hapes Cluster? Sister of Dathomir?” Then the answer hit him, and Ben sat back in his chair, peering back at Maz with a hopeful look. “Tenel Ka? My brother’s wife?”

 

“Precisely, my child. The witches of Dathomir once possessed a powerful magic, and every bit of information I have received leads me to believe that this awful deed that was done to your precious Rey was done by Dathomiri magic. I am almost certain it was someone hired by the First Order, by that beast Armitage Hux. Seek your answers with your brother’s wife, my boy, and I do believe you will be speaking to your Rey – with her memories restored – soon afterwards. Good luck, dear child. Do let me know how it turns out.”

 

As Maz’s image faded away, Ben could barely contain his excitement. Hitting a button on his comm to reach his brother Jacen, Ben did his best to explain to him what was going on, and that he and Tenel should expect a visit from him and Rey.

Next, he contacted Finn and Rose, asking if they would be able to keep the triplets while he took Rey to see Tenel. They happily agreed, and Ben went to find Rey. He knew she wouldn’t really grasp the gravity of the news, but  _ his _ Rey was still inside there, and she loved travelling. Somehow, Ben knew this Rey, stripped of her memories, would still be excited to take a trip.

He found her in the kitchen, chopping up vegetables she intended to use for dinner that night. 

 

Looking up as he stepped into the room, Rey gave him a tentative smile. “Do you need something?” she asked shyly.

 

Ben let out a sigh, “No, just to talk. Rey, we… need to take a trip.”

 

“Oh? In your starship?” Rey’s eyes lit up with excitement, and she put the knife down on the counter. Ben nodded at her, unable to breathe or formulate words as he gazed into her eyes, the sparkle within them causing desire to swirl through him at an alarming rate.

 

He would always want her – whether she had her memories or not.

 

“Make sure you pack a bag. We’ll leave tomorrow morning, after Finn and Rose come to get the kids.” Ben turned to leave the room, because if he stayed another moment longer, he didn’t think he could keep his hands off Rey – and scaring her right now wouldn’t do any good – not when he was so close to having her back with him.

 

“Okay!” Ben heard her say behind him before she let out a tiny squeal of excitement. He couldn’t help the smile that came to his lips – because that was very much something  _ his _ Rey would do.

 

_ Soon, my light. Soon. You’ll be back with us. _

….

 

Five days later, as the  _ Nevermore _ dropped out of hyperspace above Hapes, Rey gasped as the nearly pristine and wild planet came into view in the viewport. “We’re going there?” She asked, a sense of wonder in her voice – even though she had been to Hapes hundreds of times before in their time together.

 

Ben nodded, pressing the buttons that would transmit the correct codes to the Hapan authorities to let them know they were part of the Queen Mother’s family. “Yes. We are actually going to visit their leader – the Queen Mother. Her name is Tenel Ka. She’s married to my brother, Jacen. She might be able to help us with your problem, Rey.”

 

Rey was barely listening as she gazed out upon the beauty that was Hapes, as the  _ Nevermore _ made its way into the planet’s atmosphere. “It’s so green…and almost untouched.”

 

Ben nodded in response, starting to punch in the landing sequence in the  _ Nevermore’s _ control panel. “The Hapans have left only a tiny footprint on their homeworld. Much of the planet is raw, untouched forests with many sanctuaries on it.” His heart clenched in his chest because Rey – _ his Rey _ – with all her memories, already knew about Hapes. The first time they had visited Tenel Ka’s home, Rey had been in awe of all the raw, untamed nature there. They had spent weeks going to the different nature preserves. She had been so happy then. It was one of his most cherished memories.

As the neat, orderly city of Ta'a Chume'Dan came into sight in the viewport, Ben heard Rey gasp as she caught sight of the Royal Palace, which was perched on a black basalt crag, overlooking the small city. It had always reminded both Ben and Rey of a castle in one of the holo Fairytales they read to little Leia at night before bed.

 

It was hard to believe that his sister-in-law and niece lived there. Tenel Ka still had not convinced her people that the Jedi were to be trusted – so Jacen was still not viewed with anything but disdain by the people of Hapes – but Tenel had declared that he was her chosen lifemate, and so far, things were going as well as they had hoped. Jacen mostly remained on Chandrila, and Tenel Ka and Allana divided their time between Hapes and Chandrila. Between duty and the place they felt was their true home – with Jacen.

 

The  _ Nevermore _ touched down on Hapan soil, and as Ben engaged the security protocols to protect the ship while they were gone, he looked at Rey, who was standing quietly, her wide eyes peering out at the castle still.

 

“We-we’re going there? To a  _ castle _ ?”

 

Ben nodded, giving her a small, strained smile. “Yes. My brother should be meeting us in a few minutes to escort us.”

 

“A-and you said they are going to help me? So that I-I can remember things? Like you?” Rey sounded almost scared now, and Ben wanted to pull her into his arms to comfort her.

 

_ Soon enough, my light. Soon enough, I will have you back. I can feel it. _

 

The main hatch opened with a hydraulic hiss, and a tiny blonde bundle of energy ran blindly into the  _ Nevermore _ , leaping at Ben as soon as she saw him. Luckily, his Jedi instincts kicked in, and he caught the small child with a laugh, twirling around in circles until he was breathless.

 

“Uncle Ben!” Allana cried happily, laughing as her Uncle spun her around. “Did you bring my cousins?”

 

Ben shook his head, looking at his niece with a serious expression on his face now. “We came because we need your Mom’s help, Alli. Aunt Rey is sick – not her body, but her mind. She doesn’t remember any of us, so your Mom is hopefully going to help her remember everything.”

 

“Oh,” the seven-year-old now affected a pout and a sad expression. “Aunt Rey doesn’t remember any of us? Not even you, Uncle Ben? Or Braxis or Ryden or Leia?”

 

“Nope,” Ben said sadly, trying to keep the despair out of his voice.

 

“Mom will make her better, Uncle Ben. You’ll see. Besides, I learned some new tricks with my saber and Aunt Rey has gotta see how big Anji has gotten!” Allana squirmed in his arms with excitement as she talked about her pet Nexu. Ben still wasn’t convinced the beast wouldn’t harm his niece someday – but she had a way with animals.

 

“Allana! Let your Uncle and Aunt get off the kriffing ship, would you?” The voice of Ben’s older brother rang out through the cabin, and a grin came across Ben’s face as his niece turned to look at him, her eyes wide now.

 

“Daddy said a bad word! Wait until I tell Mom!”

 

Allana wriggled in his arms, and Ben set her down to cross the cabin of his ship, pulling Jacen into a quick hug. Rey was standing in the galley now, simply watching everything with a confused, yet friendly, smile on her face.

 

“Hey, you ugly nerfherder,” Jacen smirked as he teased his brother, squeezing him before letting him go. Looking over at Rey, Jacen offered her his normal wide smile. “Hey Rey, you keeping the big guy under control? I’m Jacen, by the way. Ben’s older, better-looking brother. Come on, Tenel is waiting in the Palace. Be prepared, Rey. She’s in a mood…” Jacen looked back at Ben before leaning down and picking up his daughter, slinging the little girl over his shoulder as she shrieked with joy.

 

….

 

As they made their way to the Royal Palace, Rey took in everything with a wide-eyed wonder. Her heart was beating furiously in her chest, and she felt like she could hardly breathe.

Everything here was so  _ beautiful  _ and  _ clean _ .

 

The little girl – who insisted on calling her Aunt Rey – was babbling on about lightsabers and the Force and someone named Anji, whom the little whirlwind was positive Rey was going to love, and when she felt the girl clasp her hand with one of her smaller ones, Rey looked down at her and offered a nervous, tentative smile.

 

“My mom is gonna fix your head, Aunt Rey. Uncle Ben is sad with your head broken. And I know Brax, Ry and Lei Lei need their Mommy back. It’ll be okay. You’ll see!” Allana smiled up at her Aunt, and as the transport speeder pulled into the courtyard of the Palace, she was the first to hop out and run towards the large marble and gilded gold doors.

 

The Queen Mother made her way into her receiving room, smiling as she felt the familiar Force signatures of her husband, daughter and brother and sister-in-law drawing near. Rey’s predicament was troublesome, but after speaking with trusted members of the Sisterhood, Tenel was certain they could reverse the damage of whatever spell had been cast over Rey. There could be… side effects; however, ones that she would need to discuss with both Rey and Ben.

 

After having her assistants settle their guests into the family wing of the Palace, Tenel paced in her personal quarters, her husband watching her with a bemused expression on his face. “You can do this, right? You and your Dathomiri friends?”

 

Tenel looked at Jacen, nodding softly. “Yes. Rey is going to have to agree to it, though. We have to undo what has been done inside her brain. She has to be willing and give us entrance. It may be…painful… though. Jacen, do you think you can keep Ben occupied? I remember how he was when Rey was hurt before, during the war. You and Anakin had to knock him out.”

 

“Are you saying I need to knock my gigantic tree of a brother out again? Because I so will,” Jacen made a show of cracking his knuckles, and his wife stopped pacing, turning to level a gaze at him.

 

“Now is not the time for one of your jokes, Jacen Solo.”

 

“Now is always a good time for jokes, Tenel. You know I will take care of Ben. Just do what you need to do to bring Rey back to us.”

 

Tenel nodded, looking up as one of her attendants announced the arrival of Ben and Rey. Tenel went to her brother-in-law, pulling him close for a hug. Rey was greeted in a similar manner a moment later – although that brought a frown to the already confused woman’s face. She didn’t remember Tenel – but she was being greeted in a fairly intimate manner by the woman.

 

After Ben and Rey had settled into seats, Tenel looked between them both. “I can only be honest with you both. We’re dealing with old, ancient magic here. Rey, I need you to give us permission to enter your brain, to see what has been done to take your memories. Once we know what was used, we can repair it. I have to caution you both, though – both the light and dark have to work together on this to heal Rey – and we don’t know what side effects she may experience.”

 

Tenel next looked at Ben. “You can’t be present, Ben, as much as I know this will disturb you. Jacen has been tasked with keeping you occupied while we work, and if you try to barge or bluster your way into where we are working – well, Jacen will make sure you’re stopped. Understood?”

 

Ben gulped before nodding. His eyes went to Rey, who was sitting silently, deep in thought. Finally, her hazel eyes went to his, and she asked softly, “Y-You love me, right? I mean… we had a good life together?”

 

Ben swallowed thickly, tears threatening to spill from his eyes as he tried to keep it together for a few hours longer. Finally, he nodded. “It wasn’t always easy. We… we were enemies, at first. On two different sides of a war. But I couldn’t be the man the First Order wanted me to be, not after meeting you. So, I left. After that, we were inseparable. It wasn’t always easy, but we had each other… and we love each other fiercely. There’s nothing we won’t do for each other. I would burn a trail from one end of the Galaxy to another for you.”

 

A long, pregnant moment passed between them, their gaze locked as Rey searched his eyes, where she found nothing but truth and unabashed love and devotion in their depths. With firm resolve, Rey finally nodded and looked at Tenel.

 

“Let’s do it.”

 

….

 

As thirteen women gathered around a well-sedated Rey in a lower level antechamber of the Palace, Jacen and Ben sat in the Queen Mother’s living quarters, a game of Sabacc spread out in front of them and a half bottle of Corellian whiskey already consumed. Ben was nervous, his eyes darting around the room as he tapped his fingers on the table incessantly.

 

“Maker, Ben, would you stop with that? Before the sun rises, you and Rey will probably be in bed together, getting reacquainted. Which reminds me, I should probably make sure there are, um, extra sheets laundered and put in your rooms.” Jacen grinned at his brother as he laid out his cards, humming in satisfaction. “I’ve won seven hands in a row now,” Jacen teased Ben. Ben just shrugged, all his focus on the floor beneath his feet. Rey was down there, and he hoped that soon, he would feel her Force signature crying out to his again through their bond.

 

Three hours passed, then four, and Ben grew more desperate as the night dragged on. Jacen did his best to keep him occupied, but eventually, his older brother had moved to a comfortable chair on the balcony, overlooking the pristine city, his datapad in hand as he watched pod racing results on the Holonet.

 

….

 

Their bond didn’t flicker back into existence; it flared like twin gamma ray bursts, blinding and so bright it took Ben’s breath away. His soul reached for its other half, coiling around it and caressing it like the sweetest consonance.  _ Rey! _ Ben sighed out through the Force, her name like the sweetest benediction. The Force hummed with satisfaction, the proper balance once more restored to the Universe.  _ Ben! _ He heard Rey say through their bond, and he projected love and happiness to her.

 

When she started screaming, Ben cried out, “NO!” Before he made it two steps, Jacen had forced him to sleep with a simple gesture of his hand and a push through the Force into his younger brother’s head, and as he lowered Ben’s body back onto the couch, Jacen was thankful he had stayed by Ben’s side all night.


	5. Happy Endings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey comes back to Ben, and they get their happy ending.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another fic finished! I really enjoyed taking Ben and Rey on this little journey, and I hope I did Ash's prompt justice!
> 
> Prompt, beta and moodboard all done by the wonderful [Azuwrite](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Azuwrite)!

[](https://imgur.com/H9nnHLL)

Ben came to first, his body jerking into consciousness. He jumped to his feet immediately, his wife’s name leaving his lips as his brother stood as well. “Rey…” Ben licked his lips, his mouth dry as he felt through their bond, hoping to find the connection that had been gone for so long still there. Ben let out a long breath when he felt Rey through their bond, although she appeared to be unconscious at the moment – but the bond was there again, as strong as ever.

“Is… is she okay? How long have I been out?” Ben’s eyes met Jacen’s, and he was positive his brother could see the pure panic in them.

“Four hours or so. Rey is fine. Tenel checked in a bit ago… they had a difficult time for a bit there, but they all agree – Rey will be fine.” Jacen swallowed hard, moving closer to Ben and putting out a hand to clasp his brother’s shoulder before continuing on, “They, they said it was definitely some Dathomiri magic, Ben, and it took all of them – all their power combined – to undo it. Tenel’s not sure what memories Rey will get back, but the first thing she said when she came to afterwards was your name, so we’re all hopeful.”

“Where is she? I need to be with her.” Ben looked around, as if he could make his wife materialize in front of him.

Jacen sighed before answering his brother quietly, “Your usual room. Tenel is with her. Ben, just… be prepared, okay? In case she doesn’t remember everything when she wakes up.”

Ben nodded at Jacen before turning and striding out of the room. Rey hadn’t remembered him, or their children, for almost a year now – what was more time to him now? He would do whatever it took to bring her back to him, to their children.

It occurred to him, as he strode through the corridors on his way to the set of rooms that were set aside for family when they visited, that if this had been almost six years ago, when the First Order had crushed the Resistance and took their rule of the Galaxy, that Ben would have gone completely crazy, tapping into the darkness that still rested inside him – until whomever had done this to his Rey would lay, crushed and bloody, at his feet.

How far he had come in such little time. Now, all he wanted was to lay eyes on his wife, and to wrap his body around her like a protective cloak. She was the reason he no longer reached for the dark, of course, instead choosing to bathe himself in the light. The bond they shared was special and powerful, and not having it for the last year had left him hollow inside, like less of a man. He was empty – but now he could feel her again, residing in that spot in his soul that had been carved out perfectly for her.

Ben stepped inside the door to their rooms, the door closing with a soft hydraulic swoosh of air behind him. Rey was laying on their bed, her eyes closed and her hair drenched with sweat – Ben could only assume how difficult it had been for his love to have people inside her brain, trying to undo whatever magic had been woven so tightly within it. He couldn’t begin to understand how any of it worked – the Dathomiri closely guarded their secrets.

Tenel looked up from her vigil at Rey’s side, standing and moving across the room towards her brother-in-law. Stopping just short of him, she gave him a reassuring smile before speaking. “She’ll sleep for a while, still, I’m afraid. The magic we had to unravel was very thorough – and very deeply woven into her psyche. There is a chance she may never remember everything, Ben. For the foreseeable future, you will need to make sure she drinks the Water of Life I have left beside the bed. It will help heal everything inside her head, beyond what our magic has already healed. Are you well? Jacen said he had to help you sleep when we started working on her.”

Ben gulped as he listened to Tenel, his gaze going to Rey’s still figure on the bed. “I’m fine. Thank you, Tenel. For everything.” Ben looked at his brother’s wife, tears glistening in his eyes. He was lucky to have the family he did – and it was hard for him now to remember how he had thrown them all away because of Snoke’s lies.

As Tenel bid him goodbye and slid out the door quietly, Ben went to Rey’s side, watching her sleeping for a few moments before he reached out, adjusting her slender frame so that he could fit in the bed with her, his larger body wrapped around hers protectively as she slept. He buried his face in the nape of her neck, enjoying the feel of her in his arms again, and the thrum of their bond in his soul.

“Ben?” Rey’s voice was a tiny whisper in the dark of their room when she woke hours later. Her head felt funny, a dull headache pounding from within, and everything was hazy to her – except for Ben. He was asleep, his arms wrapped tightly around her, just like they always were when they slept together like this.

He would protect her, even in sleep. He would always protect her, and their children. Rey stilled, listening to the sounds of their home, her eyes narrowing as she realized – they weren’t in their home, or in their bed. She wiggled, trying to get out of her husband’s arms to investigate, but he only drew her closer, murmuring something in his sleep as his lips pressed softly against her hair.

“Ben!” Rey turned in his arms, nuzzling her face in his chest as she sighed happily before poking him in the chest with one finger.

“Whowhere?!” Ben came awake with a start, a sharp pain in his chest followed by the realization that Rey was awake and still in his arms.

Rey let out a giggle at his reaction before planting a tender kiss on his lips. “Hi. My head hurts, and I was about to get out of bed to figure out just where in the kriff we are? I don’t hear the kids rustling around in their beds.”

“Rey? You… you remember me? Wait… what are our children’s full names?” Ben’s eyes searched hers as he waited for her reply, one hand coming up to cup her cheek.

“Um, yes? You’re my husband, Ben. We have three children. Ryden Luke, Braxis Han and Leia Rose, in the order of their births. Why are you looking at me like you haven’t seen me in years, Ben? What’s wrong?”

“I…” Ben’s lower jaw was working furiously, tears pooling in his eyes as he looked at Rey.  _ She remembers me. She remembers _ us. “You… what do you remember, Rey?”

Rey’s face screwed up in concentration as she thought about the last thing she remembered. “I remember kissing you goodbye after telling you I loved you and heading to the market. That and you screaming my name, like you were terrified, and pain. What happened, Ben?” Rey knew something had happened, because Ben’s eyes were absolutely haunted and sad. “Are… are the kids okay?” Rey’s eyes widened in worry now, one hand grasping his forearm tightly.

“The kids are fine, sweetheart. Happy and healthy… but they miss you. Rey, you’ve spent the last year under some sort of Dathomiri magic that robbed you of your memories. You didn’t remember me… the kids… our life together – any of it. You would wake up every morning and only remember your name. It… I don’t know how I kept it together, to be honest.” Ben was crying now, tears streaming down his cheeks in rivulets that Rey leaned forward to kiss away.

“Shhh, Ben, it’s okay. I’m here now. I remember you, and the war, how we met, how we fell in love. I remember our beautiful children, who are all the perfect combination of you and me. I can’t imagine how hard it was for you, but you were strong… like the warrior I know you are. My warrior.”

Ben pulled her closer, his lips pressing to hers softly and lovingly. “I wasn’t a warrior, my light. I was lost without you. I held it together for the kids, and I had help from Finn and Rose.” Rey nuzzled closer to him, and Ben closed his eyes, humming contentedly.

“I love you, Ben. I’ll never leave you again.”

“I love you too, Rey. I know you won’t.”

….

**2 Years Later**

It had taken many months of imbibing the Water of Life until Rey regained all her memories – save the ones of the time she had spent locked away in her mind. She still didn’t like thinking about the time, and the way it had made her husband and children feel.

Ben thought it had almost broken him, but Rey knew it had only made him stronger. He loved her with a fierce determination he hadn’t had before, and every time he touched her it was like he was touching her for the first time again. It had taken losing her – not physically, but mentally – to make him realize he could be better for her, as a husband, a lover and her partner.

Rey denied that, of course. She had always thought Ben was perfect, and she would never change anything about him. For all his imperfections, he had always shown her the kind of love she had never even imagined receiving.

She was perched on his lap, watching their now six-year-old children play in their backyard. Ben nuzzled her neck, his lips planting a soft kiss on her skin as his arms tightened around her waist. “Do you think they are, Ben? Force sensitive?”

Ben watched his children playing for a moment before looking at his wife, nodding thoughtfully. “Yes. You can feel it within them. It’ll be just a matter of time before they start doing incredible things. I’m both terrified and amazed, to be honest. I never dreamed I’d have a family. I… my mom would be so happy.”

Rey looked into Ben’s eyes for a moment before leaning in, her forehead leaning against his as her hand touched his cheek softly. “She is proud of you, Ben.”

Behind them, Ryden watched in wonder as a rock floated from the rocky beach towards him, his mouth a wide ‘o’ as it came to his hand, where he clutched it before letting out a loud whoop and running towards his siblings.

Somewhere, in the aether between worlds, Anakin, Luke and Leia all smiled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Leave comments and kudos, and mash that subscribe button if you like what you see! <3
> 
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> 
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